screamdirwescraven:

i could write essays about andy samberg’s influence on incomprehensible millennial humor but the gist of it is that every snl/the lonely island bit he’s ever done (specifically the mm watcha say sketch but i could point to others) laid the groundwork for all the nonsense jokes we make today and we should be thanking him

dacelio:

No offense but I hate it when people sit down next to me to smoke…like sweetie…I was here breathin…

badbitchofcolor:

I took my ancestry test and found out I’m a fucking bitch

"If this is the only life, then why am I not just doing everything I want to do?"

James Franco (via quotemadness)

lovelikemountains:

you ever just get in bed and ur like yep this is where i’m meant to be

"I’ll marry a man who knows how I take my tea, coffee, and alcohol —
And knows when to make which."

Amen (via insanity-and-vanity)

The older i get the more i realize

stonedwithcupid:

1. Friendship is not something that is common. Genuine Friendship is rare 
2. Your mother should be appreciated 
3. Everybody wants something and never ask themselves what they bring to the table
4. The energy you give the world is the energy you receive
5. Time alone is not a bad thing
6. Love is a gift and is not something you can demand or force
7. Being comfortable should be your main priority 

eggcup:

me putting $10 of gas in my car: drink up you stupid bitch